I’ve seen the future of academic inappropriateness, and it ain’t pretty.

September 27, 2012 § 3 Comments

Last night I was reminded of a very old blog post I wrote back in 2005. Occasionally I don my academic’s hat and attend conferences, and when I do I like to tell tales afterward. This particular conferences at Syracuse was keynoted by Alain Badiou and Slavoj Zizek, along with a few more religious-studies bound luminaries (Daniel Boyarin being one of the notables). The write-up as a whole was a pretty uneven affair I won’t even bother linking. Oh . . . but this, this still makes me smile.

* * * *

I’ve seen the future of academic inappropriateness, and it ain’t pretty.

After I got back last night I told this story to so many people I ended up dreaming about it. Frightening stuff. On Thursday, during Zizek’s lecture, I sat near the back of the room, due to the number of Zizek fanboys/-girls who had snuck in — one of whom, btw, was wearing a ‘Slavoj Zizek Fan Club’ t-shirt, with a picture of, if I’m not mistaken, Zizek sitting in a forest naked with an army behind him. No clue. (The only person who may know is the old academic who was clearly looking at her chest while hitting on her during the evening’s wine reception, and who was summarily dismissed by her with a horrified expression that read to all who were watching at the time: ‘HELP!’) Sitting in front of me was a long-haired man, who I later learned knew Zizek personally, and his apparent girlfriend/wife/hookup. Throughout the lecture, I was entertained by their foreplay. There was earlobe licking, bra-gropping, and to culminate … preliminary ass-play. At one point, and I promise I’m neither lying nor exaggerating, he turned his back to her, his legs in the aisle, his eyes directed out to those across from him, and took his rubbing like a man. It was something to behold. The next day, they were also sitting in front of me during Badiou’s lecture. Surely, I thought, nothing could top the previous evening’s performance. Oh . . . but no. At some point, he was picking the glue from either the absent birth-control or nicotine patch on her left shoulder, rolling it between his fingers, and flicking it to the floor. And then, this is my favorite, she reached under his shirt, and popped a zit on his back. Such is love.

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§ 3 Responses to I’ve seen the future of academic inappropriateness, and it ain’t pretty.

  • Jamie says:

    I LOVED that conference, it was the best I’ve ever attended. Yeah sure, Badiou (black suit, black shirt, blood red tie, silver hair combed back, leaning over the lectern, staring down angrily and coldly pronouncing “dis is about death”) was cool to watch and Zizek was a sight to see, but the dude making out with his possibly under-aged girlfriend in increasingly inappropriate ways was totally worth the price of admission.

    But it wasn’t just these spectacles, recall also the student from the Chattanooga Bible College contingent boldly confronting Boyarin regarding whether he thought he was “smarter than Paul” and then Boyarin’s exhortation that the student come and pray for everyone . . . from the lectern-cum-pulpit. AND THEN, the student’s returning the next day only to very obviously sit directly in front of the speaker, in the front row . . . with a motorcycle helmet on.

    FABULOUS!

    • Brad Johnson says:

      Oh yes! I’d totally forgotten about the motorcycle helmet!

      I seem to recall that when I originally published my account of the conference, the very same student actually identified himself in the comments! Our exchange was apparently not noteworthy, as I can’t recall what he said, and unfortunately the comments on that old blog have all been lost. Alas . . . the memories will more than suffice.

  • Rima Dadenji says:

    I personally love the Muppet Show. I would love to attend one of their live shows, especially the old ones.

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